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Dec 20, 2010

December 20 Prompt Beyond avoidance. What should you have done this year but didn't because you were too scared, worried, unsure, busy or otherwise deterred from doing? (Bonus: Will you do it?)





Well this one is perfectly timed! Less than 48 hours ago I put a final stop to my monster-in-law!! GO me!!! A thorn in my side ... for the last 15 years I have done everything that has been expected of me, despite the nasty comments, digs, attitude and continually I've been slapped in the face (not literally although sometimes its felt like it!) .. I adore my husband and he adores me... we're made for each other... and he's my soul mate... but as far as his mother in concerned I waltzed into his life and stole him away from her... the fact that he's happy in life, stands for nothing.. we live only minutes from her and he's still at her beck and call if needed... he sees her all the time, something I've ensured... I'm not the princess/supermodel/millionaires daughter that she was expecting or maybe I missed the queue! The problem is I've been hurt deeply by her - more deeply than necessary by her personal attacks on me... I cannot change her thoughtlessness, her rudeness or her lack of respect for me.. I can only go through life on my path and not get distracted by her.... my kindness and diplomacy is wasted on her, it only leads to hostility... however last Saturday she crossed a line ... from which there is NO return... and I really thought that I would be sad and upset.. but I feel fantastic... relieved... lighter... its weird! I've spent years worrying about what she thought, did I do enough? did I get the right gift? a lot of unnecessary pressure I put on myself for what? ... when we are down, we worry too much, and we don't know what to do.. we don't know how to cope with certain situations, there's no chance to change anything... all this worry and stress led me to overeat... binge.. and use food to quiet my emotions... I know she's upset at what happened but it couldn't go on and its no going back for me! I'm shouting from the rooftops.. I'm not happy.. I want to world to hear me.. I'm not going to drown out how I feel with chocolate and cake! and I'm not the first woman on the planet who doesn't get on with her monster-in-law and I won't be the last!



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