Hello. I've been MIA. I've been not in a good head space, like most of us and I've been trying really hard to get out of the slump I've been in... Truth is, I was very comfortable in my slump, lockdowns fed into my already low self esteem and gave me to opportunity to hide away from the world, I mean the government TOLD me to stay home, JACKPOT! Covid and bronchitis gave me nearly 6 months of illness to deal with and I was so run down my GP didn't even know where to start with me. Covid made me care for everyone else except me. Literally anyone who needed a shoulder or a hand I put them before myself, because then I didn't have to think about my weight, the stigma, the discomfort. I was at a turning point just before the pandemic where my counsellor was so happy with my progress and suddenly the world stopped for us all. Of course I gained some weight back, nearly 2 and a half stone and my fear of failure just made me think I was jinxed, no condemned, to be be this way forever... to be unhappy in this body for all time. Dramatic I know, but it's true.
Weight gain was inevitable for me, I'm just thankful I'm not back at the start line. I never wanted to be skinny. I never wanted to fit into a size 10 dress, I never had to urge to be the fittest person in the room - I just wanted to be happy in my own skin. That's still the goal. I started back at weigh ins, I've been doing my meal plan, tracking my food and wouldn't you know it, I'm down 3.5lbs, 10lbs in total since the 1st of September. I know how to do this, I know the plan that works for me (it's ProPoints btw!) and I know if I can just get out of my own way, I'll get back to a place where I'm happy being me again.
So it's not one day, it's DAY ONE!
